I’m a really interesting consumer since I don’t ever really want anything and whenever I do desire something I do extensive research and know exactly what I want prior to purchasing it. Telemarketers make me wanna slap myself and picking up parts for the shop at the dealerships in town is always a fun experience as I try to walk through the sixteen hundred sales people waiting to pounce on you as you climb out of car. And even if I was there to purchase a car I’m the type of car buyer who knows exactly what year, make, model, engine size, trim style, and optional car features she wants months before stepping into the show room. So I’m not a great person to try and sell to. I want what I want when I want it and I know how to get it when I’m ready.

I’m typically not a sales woman’s best customer especially when her method of selling involves popping into my DMs to sell me tummy tea, jamberry nails, or credit repair. Now, I’m all for supporting another small business owner and have no issues with MLMs. I know that sometimes they’re scams but lots of times they work out pretty well for both the consumer and the business person.

BUT

The thing that grinds my gears is when I log on to Facebook and have 27 messages from overly familiar women whom I have never met or interacted with a day in my real life who say things like “Hey girl, I noticed that you work out. You should try my waist wrap.” Or “Hey girl, Do you know someone who would like to make $500 in their free time.”

If I were to hop into people’s inboxes and try to offer them auto repair, auto detailing, books, or transportation for their children they would at the very least think that I was strange as fuck. “Hey girl, I noticed you drive. Can I change your brake pads?” Doesn’t sound like something that should be said to an unsuspecting person. So why is it ok for you to peddle your wares to me in this manner?

It’s NOT. So, if you’re one of these individuals who are advertising and selling this way, PLEASE STOP! You’re the first reason of sixteen reasons why I don’t have Facebook Messenger on my phone.

(Sidebar If I missed the memo and this is how we’re businessing in 2018 please let a sista know so I could get my slide on. JK)

And since I wanna make sure that I’m uplifting fellow business women and not just being a Judgey McJudge face here are five other ways to advertise your goods that aren’t nearly as annoying as sliding into my DM.

1. Join a networking chapter. It doesn’t have to be BNI but I know two women who sell Organo Gold and Arbonne who are doing quite well from their BNI referrals to their businesses.
2. Purchase Ads on whatever site you’re currently practicing your DM slide on.
3. Setup a booth at local  fair or market.
4. Wait for someone to mention that they need your service in a post then offer it to them.
5. Ask your leader or whatever they call them to teach you how to run your business without sliding into your friends and families DMs.

Until next time, Stay Hydrated, Mind Your Business, and Stay the bleep up out my DMs (Sung in my Ludacris Voice.)