On Being Kind For Kindness Sake

You can say what you will about my Resting Bitch Face, you can say how you were scared to talk to me initially because I always look so serious, you can talk about how I’m not fake and can be blunt. You can even discuss how in instances where you have given me a real reason to not like you I simply don’t deal with you outside of common courtesy. What you probably also know is that I’m one of the kindest people you will ever meet.

If you do you’ve probably heard it from someone who really knows me, more than likely it would be one of my patients. I don’t push my kindness in your face. I don’t do it for show. And every so often I am reminded of why I am glad that I am so kind, because we are all going through serious shit. This life that we live is not an easy one.

There’s a young girl at my job who is not doing well healthwise. There are people at my job who treat her badly because she’s young, not a professional at her new job, and is overweight. Initially I was going to steer very clear of her because she had a crush on me and she’s so young and I just don’t need those problems. After talking to her I figured out that the crush is harmless and because of the way that other people treat her I have been extra nice to try to make up for the BS. I’ve taken her under my wings and tried to both teach her the aspects of her job that she needs help on and ensure that she provides the staff the simple things that they need.

Now that she’s sick I’m sure people are going to flood her hospital room, the same people who spread rumors that she was on drugs on Friday, the same people who show so much disdain for her on every other day, the same fake people who do things to be lauded by others. I however am not going to visit, at least until she can verbally tell me that visiting her is ok.

If she leaves this earth today I will feel good knowing that I made her laugh, that we had a relationship built out of genuineness, that I took the time to listen to her problems and dreams, and that one of the last things she yelled to me while I was walking down the hall was that she loved me, and  even though I have been telling her to watch her volume in the halls, I yelled it back, and I meant it.

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